Wednesday, August 27, 2014

thoughts and words

are running rampant in my mind.  I cant live this life pain free no matter how much emotion i block out of my life sure i am joyful and happy and sad i still fell these things it some thing im used too im always happy my babys make me happy church makes me happy my family makes me happy and its real it just feels hidden. idk how to describe. My emotions are still running high from my dad  it just sucks LORD help to deal with this if i try to block it from my mind im ok but then i cant because its to real -_- i dont wanna deal with it!! i just want the pain to stop im happy my dad is with Jesus so much better place then this hell hole of life but LORD it doesn't make it easier.
  Any who moving on.. my babys went back to school  Zaki loves it Miahs like really i hate it i just wanna stay home and watch mine-craft videos lol he loves and hes never even play it lol they are getting so big!!!


Tony is having heart surgery again on thursday he and mom are nervous this a 50/50 life saving or ending ordeal Tony said hes ready if he dies his love or the lord is amazing he inspires me!! Mom is like no way dont say this im not ready to lose anyone else as her parents died last year and my dad whose her ex they were married for 25  years thats along time.

ummm when i was like 12/13 i used to chat on yahoo 24/7 lol i met this girl on a britney spears chat we were yelling and making fun of people LOL so we became good friends and today we still are friends we exchanged addresses and she loves in Australia her name is Mery we used to write letters and send each other gifts like pen pals!! shes so funny shes a few years older then me we were PBNF's which we made it and said its poop best net friends lol we still call each other PBNF lol shes awesome were gunna finally meet this coming next year God willing her and now fiance!! are coming to USA to do a bunch of stuff shes so funny im so excited for this!! 

Micheal W. Smith has a new cd out called Sovereign its a great cd holy cow everyone NEEDS IT ill post a song from it they are all good songs tho its hard to find good cds but i can name 3 now lol

on an ending not my sister started blogging im happy she needs too it its good for you :) love ya sis! http://livelaughlovelinquist.blogspot.com/

 "And we know that all things work together for good to those who love God, to those who are the called according to His purpose." Romans 8:28


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