its been a longgg summer...

and a crazy one. Ive been away for a while with no reason and few friends have been like hey man why ur not blogging sorry i got lazy bout it :) thanks for reading anyways!! <3

   Where do i begin.. ok so we all know i lost my job and moved outta Owens so while in the midst of looking for a job i decided to go to Austin. Zakariah's dad lives there and we had made this agreement when zaki was born we would switch off going back and forth for his bday so the last time i was in Austin was 2010 so 2011&2012 Amjid came because i didnt feel like going south. Anyways we had an ok time just took the boys shopping for school clothes and toys and we went swimming a lot because its 24 hour pool and it was to hot in the day so we went at night so fun and the boys loved it  All the other time we just spent hanging out at Amjids game rooms or playing the wii. Rodney went with us and he ended up staying which is good for him to get away and start over so to say as he is working in one of Amjid's shops and an indian food "taco stand" so to say he likes it i reckon. 
  While i was in Austin Owen was here having a COW he hated every minute i was there and we were arguing a lot and it was super annoying he calls me insecure a lot that's because hes sneaky about everything. Well he thought since i was Austin and he was mad thats its ok talk crap on me to some people at church and who ever who listen to his vomit outta his mouth even he adds his ex wife's to his facebook and chats them up!! hello ur ex wife's cheated on you why still acknowledge them let them go allready man. He did break up with me because he was mad but he didnt have to talk crap about me to anyone not cool!! So when i came back from Austin the next day he was at my house telling me he loves me and he sorry and hes got counseling and gunna do more blah blah blah. Ok so thats cool im more upset because you had to chat to all ur girl friends on facebook about my life's problems and your ex wife's its not there business especially when its about my kids!! Unless your a single parent or a parent all you will never understand what its like dealing with the other parent especially if you dont have any kids. and  when you get mad you dont do crazy stuff like that!! So i forgave him because that's the proper thing to do. But we have alot of work and counseling to do both of us. neither one of is perfect and we both kinda think we are thats what our problems are. Were not God and no where good enough to even think were Christ like allthough we do strive to be. thats the lastest news with us.

 The boys have started school Nehemiah is in 1st grade hes so smart he reads so fast and good he got moved up in his reading level too im so proud of him!! Zakis in pre-k he was haven some trouble but now  hes most good to his friends and not mean thx God!!

I got a job like my old job helping m.r people in their group home. Its kinda weird because ive known them for along time because mom used to run this place for awhile now the boss is someone who used to work for my mom so she gave me a job kinda weird but cool cuz ineeded one and i love hours 6a-2pm mon- fri i cant complain. all thought Madeline is reopeing the travel center  up well see where God leads me with this one!! 

now im all caught up ill probally be back to normal blogging on sunday as it is my 29th!! bday on saturday and im having a dinner party! im sure ill post pics !!

Lord I pray that you guide me in the right direction of my life may it be  jobs or relationships You know whats best for me more then i know for my self. Help me with my kids and their little lifes for now guide them to You Lord. Thank You Jesus for selfless love and unending Grace that i need everyday i love you. Amen <3

holy jeez

where do i begin..... ah is July! i moved outta Owen's house were gunna try counseling and see how that works out. But unless he changes some things its not gunna work so whatever the Lord's will i pray it  be done!!! a week ago Sunday after noon i got fired from the airport job  i was upset and i still kinda am they said someone called and said i was rude and cussed out a customer i told him are u kidding me he said he didnt wanna hear anything  i had to say and hung upon me. I would never do anything like that but oh well. I just gotta start looking for a different job.  The boys are happy its summer   although Nehemiah is ready for school to start again hell be in 1st grade im  tryen to get Zaki in pre k too!!   On Saturday i went  on my first car cruise in;the G8! i was with some trans am and firebirds. i really wanna start a G8 club hopefully soon!! I gotta get some stuff   put  away will blog later!!

JOB1:21
21 And he said;
"Naked I came from my mother's womb,
And naked shall i return there.
The Lord gave, and the Lord has taken away;
Blessed be the name of the Lord,"

Amen

Times are changing

It has been a few months since i have blogged because of alot of things. I got a job at the airport working as a cashier and barista and helping with cooking a few things i really like it some of the people are really cool. In march we went to Indiana to go see my grandma a few weeks later she passed away my mom toke it and is taking it still hard. Owen and I are pretty much on the outs we cant stand to be around each other no more and we fight we are just two differnt  people and thats ok. its not Gods will for us to be together and im ok with that. Hes not my type I wanna be married to someone who is completely head over heals for the LORD  not the world. Tony had heart surgery he was ok but now hes not feeling so well. Anyways ill blog more later!

whhyy hello mr bloggie

Its been a few weeks since ive dropped a line or two so i have alot to say this night!! Owen got us a nice valentines gift a 2004 Cadillac Escalade its pretty nice and roomie i like that for the kids its comfy for them!! 

Then last week Amy me and all 3 kids  went to Indiana to go see grandma Linda who was in the hospital on her death bed we really thought she was gunna die she was in bad shape her lung had collapsed and she was bleeding internally they kept giving her blood there was a lot of people praying for her to. We stayed at my cousins Matt ,Allison his gf, house it was beautiful! It was really good to catch up with them and my other cousin Brad,whose Matts lil bro, he has a wife and 3 handsome lil sons although we didnt get to see Matts son sure hes just a as cute!! But now were back home and grandma is doing so much infact that they sent her home! Jesus healed her!! 


   Owen and I well mostly me i have changed our wedding date again simply because i have no idea when i want it or where i know how i want it just where or when or all the details im like blah blah idk! I have picked out my ring tho its getting sized now cuz my fingers are a lil chunky ones lol so thats why it looks to small in the pic on my finger thats becuz it is to small lol but its still pretty!!
  Looks like im out of a job for the next 30 days because too much stuff has happen there they had to close to change some stuff i really hope they open back up i love that place and i love all the people like the customers and employee's i already miss it!!!!! *tear*tear* i will keep praying for that place becuz its special place its about JESUS!!! 

  well i have 2 little boys that are refusing bed and its making me mad so i must go now and spank some butts if i have to..

 see you soon mr bloggie!! <3

:::FRUSTRATED::::

...very much today!! I know my moms leaving in a few days to go back to Kentucky and shes been keeping the boys while i work now i have to find a babysitter or a day care and its so not even worth it becuz i dont make enough money to pay for that crap :| i really like my job to grr the Lord will make a way im praying for this.   

Im also frustrated bout this pet situation...this stupid little dog poops every where even after you take him out and he poops i really dont like that and i know Owen gets tired of me screaming about it but im not a big pet fan grr i wish i wouldn't have gotten this lil dog hes cute but not that cute he makes me and Owen argue and i dont like that i dont like yelling and being up set up with Owen.

Lord please help me cuz im going crazy on the inside please help me find the right day care and help me with my attitude its not very nice one to day. thx

-_-

so finalllllly...

We set a date for our wedding!! March 30th 2013...just i dont have a place for time yet haha ops i will tho!! by this week...i think me mom amy ashley and aunt steph are gunna go to dallas pretty soon to go dress shopping and braids maid dress shopping i know amys gonna try and talk me out of what i want but im not changing my mind!! i know i am only gunna get married once and i want it the way i want it!! Also gotta find some one to makethe cake i want i thin i found a place she said she would charge 4.50 for each cake some other lady said 10.00 haha idiot dream on!! i wouldnt even pay that im so cheap too 4.50 is expensive to me but i know its alot of work and time so yea..

I worked all weekend 4p to 12a i hate that shift its so boring and people in the nite freak me out haha just i think cuz i work so far out of the city really. this little dog we got is really annoying but also cute but annoying hahha we went to amys and kellys for dinner and watched some of the super bowl Owen made some jalepeno poppers they were yummie and some bbq chicken wings they were good but i dont like bbq sauce to much its gross :| hehe as for now... imgoing to bed boys are asleep some i should sleep 6am comes early.. be blessed friends..

But I will sing of Your power; Yes, I will sing aloud of Your mercy in the morning; For You have been my defense And refuge in the day of my trouble. Psalm 59:16 NKJV

day smay day....i am

running out of titles sometimes. well Tony is in the hospital again...dont know whats wrong  just know that hes not feeling well and his  bp is HIGH and his <3 rate is way to fast ...ack praying for him for sure.  

Im really frustrated about a few things that have happen to Miah back in October and it still upsets him and me and all of us. only God can help us with this one... i really have no words for this tonite im so upset  i just wanna punch some kid in the face and be sure he knows who he is!!! 

i got the boys a lil puppy hes cute but right now hes crying in his cage cuz its bed time and im like why why why did i get this animal again!! grr summer time please hurry so i can put him outside were all good lil pets belong!! hell be allright as soon as i get him potty trained where he runs to the door to go out not just go in the floor yucki!! 

i have to work tomorrow night grr not becuz i want to i have to it would have been better if the girl would have asked me instead of demanding andtelling oh by the way u have to do this... umm no  i dont have to do anything you say gal.. ur just a cowork not my boss!! 

Miah seems to be liking the new school which is good!! I've been trying to teach Owen some of what the Bible says lol like we speak life and death in our life and others life ya know.. he says "oh i have this wrong with my heart" im like "dude really no you dont  your healed in Jesus name ya know" hes like "but but " me "fine stay sick and die " lol  i just want him to exercise his right faith and get to know the WORD !! i want a spiritual leader in my life not a spiritual dud i know he loves God but its more then just bout being saved,  believing in ur heart and going to church its a relationship its a love story between you and Jesus a spiritual affair i know he knows this surely i know that but come on its time to put ur faith to work and prayer time is much needed!!!! 

pray for us all we need it  Jesus gives us strength when we dont have no at all!!

things are changing..

...like Nehemiah's school..i took him out of Lakeview and now he goes to Paramount today was his first day and he seemed to love it but he was using the excuse of "im shy im shy" so he didnt have to use his work but it didnt work lol hes a silly kid but seriously im sure he was shy he is a shy kid at first i had to stay with him at school for an extra 30 mins to get him in his class and get adjusted but i think hell do just fine there!! 

Zakariah was a good at his school today for once!! but at church he was hitten and bitting :| lil brat man sometimes idk why he does this stuff i tell him its not nice even bit him a few times so he knows it doesnt feel good :| he better grow out of this bitting stuff gets me crazy!!!

I was off  work today i got caught up on laundry and my momma did my taxes so now we wait for them!! I gotta go back to work tomorrow its easy but the other day this girl was really rude telling me what i was gunna go work and what i was and wasn't gunna do :| ekk NO sir she better learn to ask not tell. i really like working there tho well see what the future holds for us Madeline says some things are gunna change and some are not gunna like it :S :S anyways whatever happens happens Gods in control not me!! 

Owen and I wanna take a couple of people out to dinner to get there advice on marriage and stuff which could help us :)(:Church was really interesting tonite...it was about "fasle signs of the end of times" like just becuz theres alot of false teachers, wars and rumors of em and earthquakes and persecution doesnt mean its the end just yet that its just life!! it was pretty interesting really Mark 13 i did it i cant wait till next Wednesday!!

 but now im so tired :| and i have to wake up to early to get Miah ready for school!! Peace! Be Blessed

My heaven Song - Phil Wickham

the weekend

has come and gone like normal... except on friday nite..Owen and I were giving concert tickets from Rick and Madeline from my job :) it was an evening with Third Day!! it was super rocken show!!! I love them and i have always wanted to see them and now i have!! it was so good!! Before the show started they were giving away stuff and surprisingly Owen's name was called he won a hat its really nice too and  then after we got their autographs and then we went out to eat with Rick and Maddy at Ihop!! I love them two they are great people of God and funny and their hearts to help anyone in need is beyond any words i could say or compare to im glad to work for them!!

On saturday i worked 4p-12a i didnt get home till 1 and i took a shower and was in bed by 1:30 and then at 630am the boys woke me up :|i was in a bad mood and didnt what to deal with NO ONE today church was good the music was ok then after church i was sleepy and grumpy and so we went to eat then i took a much needed nap and woke up in a 100% better mood and i know that made Owen cuz he was like ok jerk im done with ya today lol. 
Mom and Tony got us a washer and dryer for 50$ so its cool the dryer pluged is messed up my dad is  gunna fix it tomorrow. i have to work tomorrow 8-4p
and so im gunna go rest a bit..

what a busy day...

.....man at work today was crazy busy!!! i really like my job the people are great!! i love them!! Rick and Maddy bought Owen and i Third day concert tickets for friday night soo cool!!! i've always wanted to see them!! Praise the Lord its my chance too!! ...
and then Kennith called!!! My car was fixed today!! woot WooT got it picked up and it looks awesome like a new car!! all cleaned up and shinny i gotta scrub down the inside tho its kinda dirty and my boys put their papers everywhere grr makes me crazy!! but its all right!! 

I am so tired i had to help in the children s church tonite so i didnt get to hear the sermon and Owen doesn't remember it to tell me :| :| so i guess i gotta get a cd on sunday. 

On another note Sabreen and Amjid are  at it again making me nuts she calls and tells me drama he calls cussing her im sick of it really i wish they would leave me the heck alone!!! i know Amjid wants to see his kid but really if it was less drama it would be different. nothing is life is easy tho.

Well im pretty sure my Called out days are over. Im gunna miss all my friends in there and especially gunna miss digging into the word with Russ!! but everything begins and everything ends. actually kinda makes my heart sad but i must move on. *tears* Ill still see everyone at church but it wont be the same I love all of them in there too made some really great friends along the way. I pray that group does great things for God and they grow more!!! 


anyways God still is King of the world!! Lord i pray for more of YOU and less of me in my life in my day in my every second. I need You Jesus i love you Amen

 its time for me crash i have to work tomorrow and my poor lil feets ares sleepy.  -_-

Proverbs 22:14

Proverbs 22:14-- The mouth of an immoral women is a dangerous trap; those who make the LORD angry will fall into it.


I think when us women say bad curse words it makes us look ugly not pretty and less cared for by others.
Owen and I was on a date the other nite and this person walked in to the place we were i freaked out and totally dropped the "f bomb". I felt so stupid after saying i over reacted and said the wrong thing. I was thinking why did i say this what is my dating thinking that i said this!? So ugly of me to say. So as in saying this thing it only invoked me to get angry and upset and wanted to start dissing on the person who came into the restaurant. Which only leads to more bad words unnecessary angry and me looking like a fool. So i plan on keeping an eye on my language a lot more then i have which is bad. Also i have kids who dont need to hear foul language from their mom they will think its cool and its really not!! 

10 days later..

....from the last blog..hehe a quit of a few things have happen actually!! i got rear ended by an old man texting on his cell phone!!! he did about $9,000.00 in damage his insurance is paying for it also for the rent car too serves him right he should be paying for it all shouldn't be texting and driving!!!

I finally got a job!! at Jesus Christ is Lord Travel Center the owners go to my church and i met them there actually!! they are great people im glad to be working for them and with them!!

Tonite Owen and I went to my old church Harvest Time Pentecostal church of God I missed that place so much the people too it was good to see everyone :) i love them i love it there its like my home. I think we might start going on sunday nights :). I think we also decided that we want Bro Messer to marry us. It makes sinces hes been my paster since i went there ive know him for about 10 years its a long time! I love them.

The kids dont have school tomorrow but i have too work. So im gunna go to sleep now. nite nite <3

a new year already..

im still tripping over 2012 it  went by so fast and so much things happened i lost some really good friend but i always meet and made some freaking awesome new friends to replace the old ones!! Also ive met the love of my life :) Owen is amazing!! i love him and i pray for us a long life together!!!! 

happy New year!!

yea sorry I've been neglecting my poor bloggie poo haha it's been crazy busy around my casa!! Christmas was good the kids got a few toys and some clothes they had a good time!! me and mom cooked a big dinner and my sister an Kelly and Lillie and all of Tonys kids come over to our house is way to small for all those people to be here. but it was fun.

Owen and I got a house!! it's 3 bedroom 2 bath it's supper cute!! and cheap but I gotta find a job so I can help with all da bills life gets expensive fast!!

happy New Years!! this year I plan to make my walk with The Lord better then it has been because I have been lacking. less of me more of Jesus my life depends on it!! and I also plan on being a better blogger!!